Get all 15 MY LATEST DEBUT releases available on Bandcamp and save 90%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of WHY THE FUCK NOT?, MUSIC DOWNLOAD, YOU'VE GOT WHAT IT FUCKING TAKES, MUSIC CD, SUBLIME WITH LEMON, NEVER GIVING UP IS THE DEFINITION OF INSANITY, BREAD & CIRCUSES, WOW WOW HEY HEY!, and 7 more.
1. |
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This is really happening right now
Outside my window
Everytime the microphone's on
Everytime I try to record a song
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2. |
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Autotune
Autotune, autotune
You're a stranger but we're exchanging
And complaining 'bout our pasts
And if I were my other self now I'd have just called you an "ass"
You're a lover
And a liar
How could I even tell the difference between a spouse and a roommate anymore?
And your friends all remind me of the people I thought I'd be relieved of dealing with at this age
But they're still talking about pricey punk rock shows at the hippest spot in town
I need some counter-culture
Maybe I should just go to church? {I suppose "I need an Altar-native" could've worked as well|
I guess growing up isn't the same as getting old
No, yea
Growing up isn't the same as getting old
It isn't the same
Being mad is just the same as being right
But I could be wrong
Ohhh, autotune
Don't listen to me
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3. |
SHELTER COUGH
01:39
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I can't get up, can't see much
But who wants to?
ah?
No, can't say anything now
Cause what's the point when I don't know how to sing?
Gotta find a new thing...
Can't you hear it in my voice?
No, can't sing
Comparatively
Gotta find a new thing
Gotta find a new job or I'll end up like you
"Gotta let go of the gloom!," says the ones who aren't doomed
I caught the Shelter Cough
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4. |
UNREAL DRAMA
03:42
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Let's just jump into it
Time is running short
Neighbors are fighting in the halls again
Pounding on the walls again
It must be awful if I feel it's wrong
(That's kind of how I feel about this song)
No changes this year
Don't think you'll ever hear me say "I'm sober" anymore
Listening to the threats again
Everyone has got a lawyer and a gun
Something about addiction
A fat chain-smoking alcoholic, not a musician
This seems familiar but I could be wrong
(That's kind of how I feel about this song)
No changes this year
Don't think I'll ever get to say "I'm sober" anymore
Until it's over
Sober, S'over
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5. |
ITALIANS A GO-GO
02:37
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Tommy, you've been a real jerkoff lately
Tommy, you act like such a big shot
If I knew you were so good at stirring the pot then I'd let you take control of the sauce
Go home and get your fucking shinebox
Go home, and get that fucking box
Paulie, don't you act like you're better than me
You know I got the best Gabbagoul
Sicily
A place I fight for, but don't care to see
Family
I'd write 'em off but they're like cousins to me
I don't need your help shaving the back that you HAVE stabbed me in
Go home and get your fucking shinebox
Go home, and get that fucking box
The DOUGH that shapes my garlic knots
RAY, a guy who knows a guy
ME, that's who you should respect
PHO: that shit from Vietnam
Go home and get your fucking shinebox
Go home, and get that fucking box
Go home
Get that shinebox
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6. |
OH, FUCK
03:51
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Bro
This is a stupid fucking machine
Who the fuck needs one of these machines
This is for people who don't know who to sing
Oh shit, that's me(ek)
Bro
There is a lot of things that I could sing
But is anyone even listening? {or reading lyrics for that matter}
I sound like diarrhea when I breathe
I only make music cause I'm insane
Oh shit, oh fuck
Did I make something that doesn't suck?
Maybe this is the voice of a spirit
Maybe you'll fucking never hear it
You've got what it fucking takes
I just have to fucking take a piss
Bro
I am just scrambling to find the words
But this shit's coming out just like a turd
Is it like everything you've ever heard?
Or is it worse?
Oh shit, oh fuck
Did I make something that doesn't suck?
In my mind I know you might hear it
But I sound just like an unholy spirit
Oh shit, oh fuck
Did I make something that doesn't suck?
Don't be vain
Kurt Cobain
Now I have to take a piss in the rain
You've got what it fucking takes
You've got what it fucking takes
Inspiration
Fuck
Fuck fuck
Fuck
Fuck fuck
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
I don't care that I'm 33, I'm gonna approach this machine like I was still 15
Did you hear the part where I said, "Fuck"?
Fuck, fuck
Fuck, fuck
Fuck, fuck
Oh shit, oh fuck
Did I make something that doesn't suck?
Dope-y vein,Kurt Cobain
Now I have to take a piss in the rain
You've got what it fucking takes
You've got what it fucking takes
Inspiration
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7. |
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Yea yea yea yea
Yea
You know, you can always skip over the track
You know, you can always skip over the track
Just skip over this track
Yea yea yea yea yea
Ye-yea yea yea yea yea, gotta do this silently
Becawrles my neighbors are trying to shoot heroin
Yea yea yea yea
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8. |
ABOUT A SQUIRREL
03:47
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Sometimes I go to the park
Where there's dogs, they like to bark
Maybe I am regressing
Where there's birds that like to sing
But I like to see her falling from the sky
I like to see her forage for things
Oh, hi squirrel
Maybe I look just like a creep
When I stand out by her tree
I wonder if she will notice me?
...this song really IS about a squirrel (this ain't Pinkerton)
I like to see her, it makes my day
I'm old and broken with ADD
I like to see her falling from the sky
I like to see her forage for things
Oh, hi squirrel
Hi is what I says to the squirrel
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9. |
POPULAR SONG TITLE
04:27
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And everything sounds like something else
No matter what you do, it's already been done
Bandcamp.com will disappear someday
This is what it sounds like to waste your time
Everything sucks
I wasted my whole life
Isn't that so beautiful?
I'll never get that time back
And now they're coming for our outlets
But I can never change
I failed at everything
The music still sounds like sunshine so I can get away with gloomy lyrics
I live alone
I live alone
Cause I can't have no one around
I live alone
You're my best friend
And other cliches for your ass
And everything sounds like something else
No matter what you do, it's already been done
Bandcamp.com will disappear someday {or soundcloud, even}
This is what it sounds like to waste your time
But I can never change
I failed at everything
The music still sounds like sunshine
So you won't mind that it's become repetitive
And I can never change
I can never change
You know, I tried but I'm at that age
Now I'll just have to live with myself
Growing up is not the same as getting old
Never giving up is the definition of insanity
You've got what it fucking takes
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10. |
MIKE LOVE TO ME
02:49
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(Yes I'm really typing this out)
Ba, bop ba-bampa bampa, my voice too
Ba, gotta put my "bampa-ba" in the song and then I sing a line about a car
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MY LATEST DEBUT recommends:
YOU KNOW WHAT COMES AFTER "TAE KWON"? "DO!"? OK THAT IS BOTH THE QUESTION AND THE ANSWER, BUDDY: "DO". OK? JERKOFF!
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